Humans have very good reasons to imitate the powerful and the successful. We desire power, prestige, and status. We want to be acknowledged, recognized, and praised. This desire may seem to be vain, but the desire is helpful to us in achieving important things in our lives. Historically, a person with more power and prestige gains access to more resources is less concerned with survival, and can even attract a mate more easily. Power and prestige are valuable.
Humans want to fit in but after they ‘fit in’ many look for ways to stand out. They look for ways to increase their power and prestige. This is one reason we pay attention to the habits of highly effective people. In this blog, we have done a review of each of the seven habits describing their value.
Now, consider how the successful conduct themselves.
Are they disorganized?
When you see them, do they are confused or disheveled?
Do they have a messy home or automobile?
The answer to these questions, at least, for the most part, is no. Successful people are organized, present a carefully prepared and well-groomed persona, and operate in clean and wholesome environments.
It is wise for us to imitate the ways of success in the areas of organization, and preparation. Even doing simple things such as keeping our car clean and getting a haircut will help us to achieve higher levels of success. Being organized contributes to a better life.
We recommend avoiding behaviors that will lower your status. Trim your hedges, cut your lawn, and keep your home clean and tidy. Do not be the slob of your neighborhood.
Be the architect of your life. Take back control. You can design your life.
Give us a call at 802-295-6065 if you live in the Upper Valley and need extra support for keeping your home clean and tidy. We have been providing homeowners of the Upper Valley with top-notch home cleaning services since 1993.
This is known by people who study human behavior as temptation bundling. It works. But before we dig into the actual process and result, let’s review some background information.
Your brain has far more neural circuitry associated with wanting something than liking something. The wanting centers of our brains are much larger than the liking centers. The liking centers are smaller, but they are not concentrated – they are distributed like small islands throughout your brain.
The human brain has evolved to crave and desire something. The simple observation that the brain has evolved to allocate significant space to the regions of craving and desire is evidence of the crucial role a craving process plays. Desire is a considerable engine that drives behavior and performance. If you have no desire to do something, then there is a high chance you will not do it or will not do it to the best of your ability.
The release of dopamine is fundamental in creating a desire. Dopamine is released when you experience pleasure and when you anticipate it. This is an important observation.
Habits are a dopamine-driven feedback look. Every highly habit-forming behavior is dopamine-driven.
Here are a few examples:
Taking drugs to get high
Eating junk food
Playing video games
Browsing social media
These activities are associated with higher levels of dopamine.
How does this relate to anticipation? Glad you asked.
Studies reveal that gambling addicts experience a dopamine spike right before they place a bet. There is little evidence of a dopamine spike after they win.
Drug addicts get a surge of dopamine when they see their drug of choice and anticipate taking it, not after they take it.
An adult thinking and anticipating a vacation can find this to be more enjoyable than the actual vacation.
When your dopamine rises, so does your motivation.
Let’s now apply this to keeping a clean home.
Examples
You want to clean your home, but there is no pleasure associated with cleaning. Let’s think about how to link it to something that you do like.
Netflix – You want to watch something on Netflix. This is a big want, and anticipation makes you feel good. Therefore, after I clean the one room I need to clean (name any room), I will watch Netflix. If you link a need (cleaning) to a clear desire (Netflix), the need will be accomplished.
Social Media – You love using social media to see what friends and family are doing. You love to comment on their activities. This increases your dopamine level. You feel good about connecting with friends and family. However, you need to organize your home office. Connect the organization activity (need) to the desirable action (want).
Cleaning and organizing (your needs) and now connected to something you desire. The anticipation of the want and desire and the associated increase in dopamine will motivate you to complete your cleaning and organizing tasks. Needs and wants are now combined for a successful outcome.
If you do need some help with cleaning your home or office, give us a call at 802-295-6065. We can relieve the stress of cleaning, save you some time and help to make your home or office a more pleasant place to be.
There was a problem at the airport. Men were missing the urinals. This was creating a need to increase the cleaning budget to keep the bathrooms clean. The cleaning department decided to try an experiment and created a small sticker that looked like a fly. They placed this sticker in the urinal and located it where when to aim at the bug men created less splash-over as their aim was significantly better. The spillage around the urinals was reduced. The stickers reduced bathroom cleaning costs by 8% and increased cleanliness.
This story is significant in that a visual cue triggered a positive reaction.
Here are a few ways you can create positive actions with a visual cue.
You sometimes forget to take your daily medications. A visual cue could be to place your bottle pill in a special place next to your toothbrush in your bathroom. You brush your teeth every day and then take your medication.
You have made a commitment to practice the guitar more frequently. Instead of putting your guitar away in the closet where you do not see it consider getting a guitar stand and placing your guitar in a convenient place where you like to study or relax.
You have committed to sending more hand-written thank you notes. If so, then keep a box of thank you note cards right on your desk.
You have decided to drink more water. You can establish some visual cue by filling up three or four bottles in the morning and placing them in strategic locations you frequent each day.
These visual cues are designed by you and placed in your environment. You can design your environment so that you create good habits that lead you to accomplish your objectives.
You can alter the spaces where you live and work to increase your exposure to a visual cue. You can also reduce your exposure to a negative cue. I know a smoker that likes to smoke while sitting on her back deck. In fact, just going out on her back deck triggers her to smoke a cigarette. This is a bad habit. A visual cue may be to rearrange the furniture so that it is different (it helps to break the pattern of smoking). Another action could be to remove anything associated with smoking (the ashtray for example). She makes a cup of coffee and sips it on the deck while smoking. Another action could be to never bring a cup of coffee out to the deck (until the pattern has been broken).
If you create cues for doing positive things, then also think about cues for negative things that you do (or don’t do). Doing both will be very positive for you.
Be the architect of your life. Take back control. You can design your life.
I want to start with an experiment that was performed with three groups of people.
There were 248 people in total and each individual was assigned to one of the groups.
The objective of the experiment was to gain insights into how people could commit to doing something and in the case of this experiment the “doing something” was to exercise.
Group One: Control
Group Two: Externally Motivated
Group Three: Externally Motivated and Internally Committed
Group One was told to simply track how often they exercised.
Group Two was provided with reading materials on the benefits of exercise and each also attended a presentation on the benefits of exercising.
Group Three also received the external motivational items (reading materials and presentation) but were also asked to define specifically what day, when, and where they would engage in a minimum of 20 minutes of exercise.
Results:
Group One: 35% exercised at least one time per week
Group Two: 38% exercised at least one time per week.
Group Three: 91% exercised at least one time per week.
Observations:
There was essentially no difference in performance between Group One and Group Two. There was a substantial increase in the exercise level with Group Three (more than two times) when compared to groups one and two.
This speaks to the concept of implementation intention. If one truly intends to do something then that individual becomes specific as to what, when, and where.
Have you ever had this conversation with a friend? You say, “it’s been a while since we have gotten together let’s get together soon”. Your friend agrees. You say it and it sounds great to both of you but the get-together does not happen. If instead, you said, “let’s get together at the Skinny Pancake in Quechee for breakfast, next Tuesday, at 9:30 AM”. To be clear and specific makes this get-together very likely to happen.
The same goes with the cleaning of your home.
When will you clean out the garage? Be specific. State which day and what time and for how long. Write it down tell your partner. Make it clear to yourself that you are committed to cleaning the garage (perhaps only for two hours but committed).
If you are going to call a cleaning company and schedule an appointment for them to come and discuss their service with you then define when you will call and follow through. Also, when you speak with the cleaning company you would never say come over some time and we will review the situation. Both parties would never allow this. You would agree to a specific day and time and both parties would know the place.
Specific commitments count!
Don’t say, “I’m going to exercise more.”
Don’t declare, “I’m going to eat healthier.”
Don’t simply state. “I’m going to keep my home clean.”
Be specific about what you will do. Write it down to make it more substantial. Formulate a plan with details defined.
It doesn’t matter who you are, what you do, or how successful you are; you will have times when things do not work out as planned or imagined. However, you need to execute with a position attitude.
Do No Become Overwhelmed – Put Things In Perspective
When problems arise and know that they will, do not play the victim and do not allow yourself to feel as if there is no solution. Take a step back and maintain a positive attitude. Also, it is worth noting that many people tend to make more of a problem and exaggerate it. You turn what is often a minor problem into a large problem by doing this. When you encounter problems and then seek to resolve them, remember that it’s essential to look at the larger picture. Keep it in perspective.
Mark Twain once said: “There has been much tragedy in my life; at least half of which actually happened.” Take a step back and lighten the load. Don’t let problems take on a size and magnitude greater than what they are. Even in your most challenging times, there are still positive things happening. Ask yourself if this will matter a year or three years from now.
Also, it helps to maintain perspective to think about other problems you have faced and how you have worked your way through them. You’ve gotten through issues and challenges in the past, and you will get through this one too. Good and bad things happen to everyone, don’t be surprised by difficulties. Instead, embrace them with an intent to find a proper solution.
Problems are part of life.
Don’t Beat Yourself Up
When facing problems, the last thing you need to do is beat yourself up. However, many people do precisely that. Nothing good comes from chastising yourself or wallowing in self-pity and guilt – playing the role of the victim.
Perform to find a solution and do this with a “guilt-free” approach. A guilt-free approach will allow you to respond with your best self. Your thinking will be clear, you’ll have more energy, and you will see options and viable solutions that just are not visible when you are steeped in blame and shame. You can’t change the past, but you can learn from it and improve upon it.
As someone once said, problems are opportunities in work clothes.
Focus On What You Can Control
It’s important to be clear on the outcome you want as you work through your challenges – define your ideal outcome – determine what you want to have happen. Once you are clear on the outcome, it’s equally important to define what you can and can’t control. You don’t control outcomes.
While defining the ideal outcome is essential, you will need to focus your energy on the things you can control. What you can control are your actions. If you put too much emphasis only on the outcome, it can become paralyzing. Know the outcome you desire and focus on the steps you can take to get there.
Start & End Each Day In Gratitude – Be Appreciative!
There are many things you can be grateful for even in times of adversity. Whatever you focus on and think about will be magnified. Therefore, be intentional about magnifying the positive. Use a routine daily activity to trigger your gratitude. As an example, as you are looking over your to-do list at the start of each day, state what you are grateful for. When you are preparing to end your day consider what happened that day for which you are thankful.
It’s important for your well-being and for how you address any problems that you fill your mind with positive thoughts. This will be especially meaningful in tough times.
Stay Connected To Your Vision & Goals
When you are in the middle of problems and feeling stressed, it is easy to focus on the short term. It is difficult but necessary in these times to not lose track of your dreams and aspirations. You need to push yourself to imagine a better future.
You can’t put off working on your goals until all your problems have been resolved. There will always be some sort of problem. Connect with your goals every day.
It doesn’t matter how you feel; times of difficulty are precisely the right time to connect with your best self and aspirations. View the present in the context of your longer-term vision and your goals. Remember that the problems you are currently experiencing are temporary and will not hold you back from your destiny.
Summary
What has been presented are five things you can do to stay positive in challenging times. We all face challenges. Learning to stay positive during problems will position you for not only a faster, more productive recovery but also a more joy-filled life.
If you need some help with cleaning your home or office, give us a call at 802-295-6065. We can relieve the stress of cleaning and to have a clean and tidy home or office also helps to keep things in perspective and to maintain a positive attitude.
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Home Cleaning
Empower Yourself – Step by Step
Stephen R. Covey emphasizes a return to principles or values to achieve change in our lives. The seven habits are a step-by-step model that empowers you to make decisions and act rather than reacting to events around you.
The “habits” are effective because they have strong connections to emotional intelligence and put a powerful emphasis on the importance of self-awareness.
Stephen Covey referred to “private victory”, which related to personal change. Covey stressed that we need to master ourselves before we can extend success to things beyond ourselves.
Cleaning your Home – Be Proactive!
You are the one responsible. You have a responsibility. A proactive person decides how to handle any situation. Realize that you are not forced by some nebulous external force to have an untidy home. You can choose. You can make your home a sparkling and clean home environment. It’s your decision!
People who do not see themselves as responsible sometimes blame others for their situation. They are victims without the ability to make proactive decisions on their own. However, this victimhood approach prevents you from being proactive about your situation. If you desire a clean and tidy home, then do not view yourself as a victim but rather be bold and proactive.
You can:
Devise a plan
Create a home cleaning team
Set assignments for other members in a team approach
Circle of Concern & Circle of Influence
Stephen Covey explained in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People a concept known as the Circle of Concern and the Circle of Influence. Covey explained that highly effective proactive people focus their attention where it counts. Using this concept, you would focus your attention inside the circle of influence.
You may be concerned about things outside of this circle, but you will be much less effective as you have no influence in this larger circle.
Suppose you focus more on your circle of concern and not on what you can influence. In other words you will be much less effective. Moreover, in addition to being less effective you are inadvertently supporting a thought process that makes you a “victim”.
You may feel you cannot keep your home clean because:
Their behavior is the reason or . . .
The economy is preventing me from having a clean home or . . .
Once the weather improves, I can get organized or . . . (fill in the blank _________)
OK, these may be valid factors, but focusing on these and not on what you can do limits or reduces your ability to make a positive change. Be proactive. Focus on what you can do to move in the right direction.
One item may be to ask for some help. You may want to have a professional home cleaning service get you started and to take care of the more significant or more mundane cleaning tasks. Even this one simple step – to contact a home cleaning service – would make a big difference. Because then you can focus on the next big home cleaning step to reach the goal – a clean and tidy home!
Be Proactive
If you do need some help with cleaning your home or office, give us a call at 802-295-6065. We can relieve the stress of cleaning, save you some time and help to make your home or office a more pleasant place to be.
“Your most important work is always ahead of you, never behind you.”
–Dr. Stephen R. Covey
We all want to make progress in our lives. Most human beings have this desire. Today, people are working very hard but do not seem to be making much progress. This creates a level of frustration that further exasperates the situation.
Let’s examine a principle that is essential to achieving something. We can investigate the concept of “begin with the end in mind”. This principle is expressed as Habit Number Two in the Famous book by Stephen Covey titled “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” (a book we highly recommend).
Fun fact, as of this writing, it is the 32nd anniversary of the publishing of this book on effectiveness wisdom. Stephen Covey presented 7 habits in a book published in 1989, and he described these 7 habits as timeless and universal.
The book has sold more than 40 million copies worldwide.
House Cleaning – Begin with the End in Mind
Begin with the End in Mind means to think out the result – envision specifically and clearly how you want things to look in your thoroughly cleaned and organized room or area. Forming a clear vision of your desired outcome is fundamental to the achievement of your desire outcome. Before you start, envision the result.
Your vision of the outcome defines who you are and puts your organization and cleaning goals in focus. To realize the destination means that you first create the picture in your mind, which then propels you to move your ideas forward in the real world. You are the leader of your own life. You create and control your living environment. Take the first step in taking control of your home living environment by envisioning it clean and well organized.
Here are some tips.
Begin with the End in Mind – One Step at a Time
Take one room or area at a time. Break the ultimate objective into smaller, more manageable pieces. It is much easier work to organize and clean one room at a time. It is also much easier to envision the desired outcome one room at a time.
Achieve Higher Levels (with the end in mind)
Look for other opportunities to make things move toward your desired outcome which may be an even higher level. Perhaps a wall needs some minor repair. Envision it done! Perhaps there is something that you no longer need acting (more than acting, it is) like clutter. Envision it gone! Maybe you need to change things up a bit with some new lighting. Imaging the new lighting in place.
If You Need Help – Ask
Get some help. Sometimes you may need a bit of help. Habit 7 is to use your resources. In the book, it is called “Sharpen the Saw”. What this means is that you tap into the highest and best contribution of everyone on your team. You build and unlocking the full strength of your team. What is that you say? I don’t have a house-cleaning team. Well, imagine that you do. You can add a team member to help you out. A Clean Vision can become part of your house-cleaning team and we will be happy to be part of your team.
If you do need some help with cleaning your home or office, give us a call at 802-295-6065. We can relieve the stress of cleaning, save you some time and help to make your home or office a more pleasant place to be.
